I’ve been having some serious writer’s block lately, and it’s mostly because there have been some big events happening in my life. Last week, I took a huge leap, a giant risk, and my first ever real step into uncertainty.
Staying Safe
I’ve pretty much played it safe my entire life. In high school, I got the good grades to gain me easy acceptance into the school of my choice. I went away to school at a University I’d been spending the last two years visiting my boyfriend at. When I went, I already knew where everything was, and had a decent support system of friends in place. I chose a program that was sure to land me a job after school, and worked hard to get good grades.
When I graduated, I took a job back in my home town, working for a company filled with relatives. I got to use my degree and enjoyed good job security, wages, and benefits. I got my first taste of real world working in a relatively unchallenging environment. I took advantage of that, I did the dutiful thing and paid off as much of my debt as possible.
Last week, however, I stepped out of my comfort zone. I accepted a new job, one I’ve day dreamed about, but never thought I’d be able to land. I thought long and hard about the ramifications of this. I’d be losing the lower expectation environment, and the security that comes with working with family. Instead, I’d be exchanging those things for the chance to challenge myself, and to do something I love.
Fearing Failure
Of course, it would be a new challenge. The possibility of putting myself out there, and potentially failing, presented itself for the first time in my life. I was afraid to accept the job. Afraid that it wouldn’t work out and I’d be left jobless in a rural town with no option but to move. Afraid that I’m not cut out for this new challenge. That fear left me undecided for what seemed like a century.
I’m sure these fears were dumb and unfounded. I know that I’ll work hard and that I can do what it takes to succeed. I know that I wouldn’t have been hired without the anticipation that I’d be successful in the position. But they are here, these fears, they are persistent, and they are what has been keeping me from sitting down at my blog and writing this post.
The thing that finally convinced me was just how much I wanted it. I wanted to chance to work with the amazing, talented people in the company, to be a part of what they are trying to achieve. I also wanted to do the work, the job description seemed tailor made for me. Finally, after hovering on the edge of decision for days and worrying extensively about the many possible outcomes of this choice, I bit the bullet, accepted the job, and gave my notice at work.
Embracing Possibility
The job, which I’m so excited to start, lets me write, tweet, and post about personal finance and real estate, full time. I get to be part of a great team, and the kicker: I get to stay in my small town in New Brunswick, and work remotely, which I’m so thankful for. I’ve thought many times that if I ever wanted to switch jobs, it would mean leaving behind my 400 sq. ft. cottage and moving to a major city. I’m so thankful to my new employers for taking a chance on me, rural surroundings and all.
Finally, I’m ready to say it: I’ve got a new job at an awesome new company, full of awesome people. I’m going to rock it like I’ve rocked my debt. I’m going to pour the enthusiasm that’s allowed me to pay off $38,000 in 24 months, into this job. I’m going to give it everything I’ve got, and I’m so freaking excited to be able to take this big step, so soon in my career.
When was the last time you really “put yourself out there”? Did it work out? I want to know!